The Alligator versus the Clown I was too far away to intervene, but I did make a phone call to the police requesting an ambulance; I knew it was going to be needed. I have seen my fair share of animal attacks in these parts, most victims are outsiders, and they all do the same things. First, try to back off slowly, as if the animal just thought they saw you, but you were really a mirage. Second, size up the animals speed, and ask, can I out run it? The clown must have decided that with the combination of his baggy pants and oversized shoes, he would not have the speed. The clown went onto number three, launch a preemptive attack. When I saw that there was no chance of salvation for the clown I retreated back to my truck. I could not help thinking about the old saying, “you make me feel funny, like watching an alligator eat a clown.” I kept thinking and comparing, and did not find the scenario as entertaining as one might think.